A guy with a green frog on his head comes to the doctor.
“What’s the trouble ?” the doctor asks.
“I don’t know,” said the frog. “Something came up on my ass…”
We often receive letters that make us an analog effect with the unpredicted encounter with the ancient sphinx. There are people who have ugly habit or caprice to sign in such a way that no one than them can read the signature. We recommend these people the following historical anecdote that should be dedicated to them:
Emperor Nicolay Pavlovich once receives from the Siberian General Governor a very nice written report, but the signature could not be discerned. He immediately sends the messenger with the command that the general should come to Petersburg in the hurry.
Three months later the general arrives. He asks to be received by the emperor, but he is told to leave immediately back to his job. Another three months to traveling back. When he arrives at his residence in Tobolsk, the messenger of the emperor gets himself too. Back to Petersburg.
As soon as he arrives, he asks again to be received by the emperor, and again he is sent urgently back. Another three months on the road. And again the messenger, and back again going through Ural and Volga to Neva. Finally, after fifteen months of travel, three winters and two summers, he arrives at the Emperor’s Court. The emperor receives as soon as he sees him and asks:
“Who are you ?”
“I’m the general governor of Siberia, Your Highness.”
“And what do you want ?”
“Your Highness called me, I don’t know why.”
‘Oh, yes ! I called you to ask what your name was because your signature could not be deciphered.”
“My name is Boris Spinachov, Your Highness.”
“Very well… You have to go to Siberia right this evening.”
I. L. Caragiale, Nedescifrabil
published in “Moftul român”, 1893
In a train there was a well-known writer. When the inspector came for the tickets, the writer could not find his ticket.
“O.K.,” said the inspector. “I shall come in an hour.” But when he came, the writer could not find his ticket again.
“All right,” said the inspector, “I know you, because I’ve read your books. They are the most interesting books I have read in my life. I’m sure you have the ticket you are looking for.”
“But I must find the ticket,” answered the writer.”I have forgotten where I am going.”
It was a cold autumn day. A traveller arrived at a small country inn. He felt tired and cold and wanted to warm himself near the fire. He left his horse in the yard and entered the inn. But when he entered the hall, he saw that there was no vacant seat near the fire.
Suddenly he had a brilliant idea. He turned to the landlord and said:
“Take some whisky and give it to my horse.”
“To your horse ?” asked the landlord, “But your horse will never drink whisky.”
“Do as I tell you,” said the traveller.
All the people, hearing this, at once ran out into the yard to see the horse which drinks whisky. When there was nobody in the room, the traveller sat down comfortably near the fire and warmed himself.
A few minute later the landlord returned and said:
“I was sure that your horse would not drink whisky.”
“Never mind,” said the traveller, “Give it to me, I shall drink it myself.”
A bad fisherman never caught any fish. Everybody laughed at him. But one day he caught a big one. He thought a little and then let the fish go back into the river.
“Why have you done this ?” his friend asked him.
“Because nobody will believe that I have caught the fish. They will say I have bought it.”